Motto: "You win some, you lose some." If you use a compromising style, then you are both assertive and cooperative.You are willing to trade some of your needs in order to win concessions from the other side.You are willing to give up just about everything in order to preserve the relationship with the other party.It is certainly reasonable to use this strategy when the issue at hand is something of little importance to you.This is not to say, "Thou shalt collaborate" in a moralizing way, but to indicate the expected consequences of each approach: If we use a competing style, we might force the others to accept 'our' solution, but this acceptance may be accompanied by fear and resentment.If we accommodate, the relationship may proceed smoothly, but we may build up frustrations that our needs are going unmet.And if we avoid discussing the conflict at all, both parties may remain clueless about the real underlying issues and concerns, only to be dealing with them in the future.(Thomas/Killman, 1972 with further descriptions and analysis by Bonnie Burrell, 2001) The Competing Style is when you stress your position without considering opposing points of view.
People who overuse the competing style often use inflammatory statements due to a lack of interpersonal skills training.(This technique can backfire if you end up with a reputation for not standing your ground.Use this strategy carefully.) Two other times when an accommodating strategy can be appropriate: (1) if you are a manager and want your subordinates to take on responsibility and learn from their own mistakes, and (2) when you are hopelessly outmatched in power and the other side is using a competing strategy and you are going to lose anyway. If you feel that your concerns are never acknowledged and your opinions are ignored, you may be too accommodating.If you are trying to pick a movie to watch, and you really don't care, it's fine to say 'Whatever you want is ok with me'.Or maybe you want to build up credit for accommodating that you might use later.Cultural Linguistic Services, within the Office of Talent Management, is in need of tutors to help UW-Madison employees develop their learning in areas such as: English language, literacy (English and Spanish), writing, math, and other subjects. To become a tutor, complete an Conflict is often best understood by examining the consequences of various behaviors at moments in time.